Before K told us that she was K, she used to love trucks. I mean LOVE them. Her 2nd birthday was construction themed, her 3rd birthday was fire-truck themed, and even her 4th birthday was Paw Patrol themed and she wanted all of their vehicles. She has loved trucks for as long as I can remember, in the same way that she has loved dresses.
I have mentioned before that dad and I had realized before her transition that K may be transgender. I remember talking to him at night both of us saying that we wondered… K loved dresses and dolls, always wanted to play with her older sister’s friends, BUT she loved trucks. I’m not even kidding. Her love of trucks was something that dad and I used as a justification for why this child couldn’t possibly be transgender. I am honestly offended at myself. After all, I am a cis-gender woman and if I were given the opportunity to jump in a big truck, I wouldn’t hesitate. Heck yeah! Those things are awesome! They are fascinating. So why is it that I could love trucks as a woman, but my child loving trucks meant she must be a boy? It’s crazy really.
As K began to overcompensate more and more on this journey, I was scared that she was going to give up her passion for trucks. At this point she has already given up some of her favorite clothes (not the dresses obviously), her favorite stuffed animal (of two years) has been replaced, and I can’t even use our gender neutral nicknames with her. This child wants nothing to do with her previous self.
Not too long ago, we went to a children’s museum. It was honestly one of the coolest set-ups I have ever seen. They had a room there where kids could be construction workers (which goes along with the truck love) and it was K’s favorite part of this whole fantastic place. She just wanted to wear her fancy dress, put her construction worker clothes over it, and build stuff. She had a blast and so did I. I was so relieved and happy to see that not everything about K had to be bottled up and set aside; K would let this passion of hers coexist with her new identity.
I really hope that she can continue to allow these parts of herself to mingle. Stereotyping things by gender is silly. Just as there are plenty of girls who like trucks (like K and myself), there are plenty of boys who don’t. I hate how the world tries to sort everything into pink and blue, whether clothing or toys. In reality we are all a mix… pink, blue, and everything in between.
I haven’t really posted any pictures of K, but here is one of her working on her construction. I will continue to keep her face hidden in any photos I post, for her own privacy, but as I find photos that work I’ll attach some 🙂